Her Most Precious Son
by Blackwater Crazziii
Summary: Though it may not have been easy for Juri to begin with, Kaname was still her most precious son. My gift to aphrodytevalentine on Tumblr for the Yume Secret Santa Gift Exchange 2017.


**A/N: I'm a bit late, but Merry Christmas aphrodytevalentine! Sorry for making you wait for your gift, but I really hope you enjoy it! I saw your prompt for Kuran family stuff and this piece just came to me ^_^**

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In the early days, it was hard for Juri to look at Kaname. Despite not being the one who had actually killed her son, he was a constant reminder of what she and Haruka had lost, and a reminder of how she had failed as a mother. Haruka would always say that it wasn't her fault- that the blame rested solely with Rido. But who had put their son into his arms? Who had let him walk away with their first born? And who was it that had made the mistake of trusting that psychotic demon again in the first place? It was thoughts like these that ran through Juri's mind day in and day out, and it was such thoughts that made her unable to hold Kaname.

When she and Haruka had first found him, their emotions had been conflicted to say the least. Their first child had been killed, murdered by their own brother no less, and the pain that had ripped through them was beyond compare. But they had also somehow been left with another child to love and protect, and they almost felt a sense of relief at having been given another chance. Conflicting emotions swirled within them continuously during those first few days, until eventually it settled into a deep-rooted guilt at having failed their first child, and yet still taking so much comfort in having Kaname.

For Juri however, that comfort was not enough. Her guilt ate at her everyday, and a certain fear began to take hold of her. Those innocent eyes of Kaname's, eyes that looked so much like her own son's, how could she protect them when she had already failed once before? How could she bear to love another son, just to possibly lose him again?

It was because of this fear that Juri kept her distance from Kaname during his first few weeks, avoiding his wide-eyed stares and happy gurgles. She would hover and check his crib of course, and yell at Haruka if he wasn't supporting Kaname's head enough, but Juri couldn't bring herself to hold Kaname herself. That was perhaps too much to ask.

Until one day however, Juri was left with no other choice.

Asato Ichijou had just had his first grandson, and congratulations were in order. So after putting Kaname down to sleep, and reassuring Juri that the baby would not wake until he got back, Haruka had left the Kuran Manor to give his congratulations. Just thirty minutes after he had left however, Kaname began to cry.

Juri felt a deep panic begin to set in as she registered the cries of the infant, and froze. She wasn't ready to hold him, and yet she knew that she couldn't just leave him crying either. Rushing into his nursery, Juri leaned over the crib and attempted to soothe Kaname without physically holding him. Tossing and turning however, and punching his tiny fists in the air, Kaname's wails became louder and louder as Juri's attempts failed. She had tucked Kaname's blanket tighter around him, waved a soft toy near his face from above, spun his mobile over his crib, and yet the tears did not stop.

' _I can't. I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't!'_

Over and over the words ran through Juri's head, mocking her as she gripped the bars of the crib. And for a brief moment, Juri felt tears well up in the corner of her eyes as she looked down at the crying baby. Just when she was about to squeeze her eyes shut however, Kaname let out a particularly loud wail and something inside of Juri changed.

' _Don't fail him too.'_ She thought.

Andreaching down into the crib, Juri quickly lifted Kaname from his covers and brought him into her arms. Rocking him gently whilst strolling around the room, Juri hummed a soft tune and watched as Kaname almost instantly calmed down. His cries stopped, his breathing quieted, and his small body relaxed as he turned inwards towards Juri. Watching Kaname calm down, Juri was surprised at how easily she had soothed him, and how quickly he had gone back to sleep.

Settling herself in a rocking chair as she held him, Juri watched as Kaname's small chest breathed in and out, and trembled slightly as she fully registered that there was a baby in her arms once again. A significant part of her was terrified at the thought of holding and protecting a child once more, but a smaller, quieter part of her felt warm and at ease.

Taking one hand out from under Kaname's tiny form, Juri slowly ran a finger through his hair, twirling a small lock around her finger.

' _He has curls like mine.'_ She mused. _'Though his hair is much darker like Haruka's...'_

Smoothing down the soft curls, Juri traced the features of Kaname's small face. Her finger ran down his nose, traced his pink little mouth, and stroked his soft chubby cheeks as he slept. Stirring at Juri's slight movements, Kaname's mouth opened into a wide yawn as he raised his fists and stretched across Juri's lap. Giggling to herself as she watched Kaname readjust himself in her arms, a soft smile appeared on Juri's face as Kaname nuzzled his face deep into the crook of her arm.

' _He's so small.'_ She thought, as she looked at his hands.

Raising one tiny fist up slightly, Juri was surprised when Kaname's hand wrapped around her finger and held on with a tight grip. Kaname was so small, so delicate, and yet he already had enough strength to grip onto her and keep her hand in place.

"I don't want to lose you," She whispered, as a single tear rolled down her cheek.

"Not now. Not ever."

Leaning down to place a gentle kiss on Kaname's head, Juri's arms held Kaname tighter as she set her resolve. She would never leave Kaname, not if she could help it, and she would always love him with everything she had; more than she had ever loved anyone else before. And as if he had somehow heard her thoughts, Kaname's eyes fluttered open. And for a brief moment, he stared at Juri before a wide grin took over his face, a happy giggle left his mouth, and his hands reached up to touch Juri's cheeks. Laughing softly with Kaname, Juri raised her son up as she cuddled him closer to her chest.

"You're my darling boy, aren't you Kaname?" Said Juri as she placed a kiss on his smiling face.

"My little prince," As she kissed the other cheek, and Kaname's smile grew wider.

"My most adorable, precious, and _cuddly_ baby!" Exclaimed Juri between kisses, laughing as Kaname gave excited shrieks whenever her lips touched his face.

It was this sight that Haruka walked in on when he entered the nursery, his wife and son laughing and playing together, completely engrossed with one another. It was a sight that warmed Haruka like never before, and was one that became common place in the Kuran household over the years. With every day that went by, Juri's love for Kaname grew larger and larger, and Kaname adored his mother more than anything else in the world.

And even when Kaname had grown much older, and was no longer a baby, he was still Juri's most darling and precious son.

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 **A/N: Thank you to everyone who read this fic! I hope you liked it, and I wish you a happy new year! Please review! And thank you again!**


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